Stress. It’s not all bad!

Regular sufferers of this blog will not that I only fairly recently returned to full duties at work. Running a watch at a fire station in South West London.

Since then we have had the odd bits and pieces of course, but the other day I went to my first significant incident since returning to work. Incident Commander at a fire in a flat on the 9th floor of a high rise. Fires in high rises have their own peculiarities, procedures that need to be put into place quickly, lots of people potentially in a hazardous situation, lots of information (some of it conflicting) coming at you quickly and managing the priorities and safety of the firefighters whose instinct is to get in there and do something. The fire itself was not particularly huge. But that is not really the point of this post. The point is I was put in a stressful situation in which people were looking to me for leadership and appropriate decisions. And it went well. Furthermore I came away with a bit of a buzz because of the stress and feeling pretty satisfied.

Considering that little over a year ago I was breaking down in tears in Tesco because I couldn’t decide what to get for lunch, it shows how comprehensive my recovery has been. And that, above all, is the point of this blog. The message to other people. During the very dark days I was very low indeed. I was barely functioning as a normal human being. Leaving aside the suicidal stages, it seemed to me and must have seemed to others, that I would never function properly again. Certainly it seemed that I would never enjoy life again. And, it was a really possibility that I would never return to my job. But here I am, functioning, taking on stressful situations, happy and satisfied. Life is not always perfect of course. But I accept that much more readily now. And that is the central message. No matter how bad it gets, how dark it seems, it will turn around and it will get better.


6 responses to “Stress. It’s not all bad!

  1. Samantha Ritchie

    Well done! Really pleased for you xx

  2. Sounds amazing xxx

  3. As Lord Sugar would say….”Guy you are hired!!” You are the man for the job and you have proved it to yourself…not anyone else. Give yourself a pat on the back… have climbed Mt Everest!

  4. I read this a while ago & it really hit home. So sorry you have been through what has obviously been a horrible episode of depression. I have to say I smiled in a wry sort of way when you mentioned about ending up in tears over deciding what to have for lunch. I had a similar ridiculous do over toothbrushes. We lost ours, and I rebought them, so we had 8 toothbrushes for a family of four – but I was completely unable to decide which to throw in the bin and it caused me almost physical pain to have to think about which to get rid of: so we had toothbrush confusion for about 4 weeks. It was that episode, amongst many others, that made me realise I’d lost the plot really, the tiniest of decisions is impossible to make when everything gets so messed up in your head – I so understand where you’re coming from. (I hope I don’t come across as an absolute idiot relating that little tale) I do genuinely wish you all the best with your continued recovery, you sound to be doing fabulously. Onwards and upwards. Best wishes and positive thoughts, Kay :O) @Chaoskay

  5. Thanks Kay. I think that sums it up very well. People use the word depressed quite casually in conversation to mean a little bit down or disappointed. I’m not sure how many people realise just how severe clinical depression affects your ability to function in the most basic ways.

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